Welcome!
I hope our shared experiences help you to be well while you take care of others.
Eastham, Massachusetts
I’m Glad You’re Here
Several years ago I had the good fortune of being introduced to a small group of nurses who were in recovery from addiction. They were amazing and accomplished women, who, sadly, felt ashamed for their illness, and who were scorned by their peers for getting sick with it. I learned that the punishment that often happens when a caregiver is ailing, creates a terrifying experience that pushes our sick comrades into the shadows. This unexpected encounter gave rise to what has become a passion for me within my work as a psychotherapist. And thirty years later, I remain enthusiastic about helping the helpers who have addiction, trauma, depression, and other afflictions, and who have discovered that the most important care that they can give, is to themselves. Many thanks to the wonderful folks over the last 30 years, who have shared their odyssey with me.
There are many ways that addiction and mental illness are traps for care givers
Many healthcare givers have been the ‘hero’ in their family of origin, beginning then to become attached to that identity, and to what I refer to as the problem of overfunctioning.
Addiction or mental illness in the family presents a genetic predisposition.
These are high stress occupations, involving problems such as trauma, overscheduling, chronic exposure to pain and suffering, grief and loss, and pressure to perform without mistakes.
The escape into the helper role if life outside of work is out of balance, can be coercive, and the star quality of some jobs can capture us.
The adrenaline rush can be addictive, particularly for emergency or critical care workers, who can navigate through distressed or chaotic environments, but feel lost otherwise.
The negative stigma around addiction or mental illness within the healthcare culture, continues to be an obstacle for those who consider seeking help.
Healthcare professionals with addiction or mental illness often view themselves as failures, but remain resistant to seeking help.
Some healthcare providers became involved in public health licensing and monitoring programs, which gave rise to increased stress, embarrassment, and confusion about compliance versus recovery.
Join the conversation from wherever you are. We would love to hear your stories and answer your questions. Some visitors are seeking help, and some have experience and strength to share. If you are in recovery and have reclaimed yourself, let us know how it all happened. We can move past denial, fatigue and embarrassment and into truth, compassion and acceptance. Despite the rumors, we’re only human.
“What you are comes to you.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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